X Communicator
12-26-2009, 10:57 PM
LSU STUDENT POPULATION:
Total university enrollment: 32,000
% of students illiterate 32.3%
% unsure about the meaning of illiterate 6.1%
Minority student enrollment (2008) 1,231
Minority students dead or missing (2009) 281
256
The new LSU Student Union will open for the 2110 spring semester!
RESULTS OF 2009 LSU STUDENT SURVEY:
1. I’m happiest when
(a) I’m in my underwear, nearly passed out, and the cable bill is paid. (62%)
(b) I’m gigging frogs (12%)
(c) People laugh at a racist joke I just told. (14%)
(d) l buy new hip boots. (6%)
(e) Other or no opinion. (6%)
(f) I feel like I accomplished something today. (0%)
]2. The most surprising fact about LSU is
(a) The school is actually accredited. (25%)
(b) There is a store on campus where you can buy books. (27%)
(c) The campus is underwater from January through June. (8%)
(d) Free barbeque sauce in the cafeteria. (3%)
(e) They let octoroons go to class with us. (37%)
3. Baton Rouge's four seasons are known as:
(a) spring, summer, fall and winter (27%)
(b) rain, humid, really humid, jacket (14%)
(c) wet, humid, football, cold & flu
(d) crawfish, crab, shrimp, oyster.
257/
These LSU grad students can't wait for class to begin.
CULTURAL HIGHLIGHTS FOR LSU:
1963: Randy Newman gives a shout-out to the school in his anti-racist rant “Rednecks”:
College men
LSU
Went in dumb
Come out dumb too.
1972: The university enrolls its first foreign student: Bobby Joe Turnbuckle, of Santa Fe, New Mexico.
1997: The school announces that after a three-year study of the issue, it concludes that Newman’s “Rednecks” lyrics were not as praiseworthy of the school as was previously thought.
MISCELLANY
Distinguished grads: None.
Often confused with: Angola State Prison.
Favorite cheap high: breathing in formaldehyde in FEMA-trailer off-campus housing.
Favorite on-campus expression: Sheeeeyitttttt.
Favorite off-campus expression: Sheeyitt.
Total university enrollment: 32,000
% of students illiterate 32.3%
% unsure about the meaning of illiterate 6.1%
Minority student enrollment (2008) 1,231
Minority students dead or missing (2009) 281
256
The new LSU Student Union will open for the 2110 spring semester!
RESULTS OF 2009 LSU STUDENT SURVEY:
1. I’m happiest when
(a) I’m in my underwear, nearly passed out, and the cable bill is paid. (62%)
(b) I’m gigging frogs (12%)
(c) People laugh at a racist joke I just told. (14%)
(d) l buy new hip boots. (6%)
(e) Other or no opinion. (6%)
(f) I feel like I accomplished something today. (0%)
]2. The most surprising fact about LSU is
(a) The school is actually accredited. (25%)
(b) There is a store on campus where you can buy books. (27%)
(c) The campus is underwater from January through June. (8%)
(d) Free barbeque sauce in the cafeteria. (3%)
(e) They let octoroons go to class with us. (37%)
3. Baton Rouge's four seasons are known as:
(a) spring, summer, fall and winter (27%)
(b) rain, humid, really humid, jacket (14%)
(c) wet, humid, football, cold & flu
(d) crawfish, crab, shrimp, oyster.
257/
These LSU grad students can't wait for class to begin.
CULTURAL HIGHLIGHTS FOR LSU:
1963: Randy Newman gives a shout-out to the school in his anti-racist rant “Rednecks”:
College men
LSU
Went in dumb
Come out dumb too.
1972: The university enrolls its first foreign student: Bobby Joe Turnbuckle, of Santa Fe, New Mexico.
1997: The school announces that after a three-year study of the issue, it concludes that Newman’s “Rednecks” lyrics were not as praiseworthy of the school as was previously thought.
MISCELLANY
Distinguished grads: None.
Often confused with: Angola State Prison.
Favorite cheap high: breathing in formaldehyde in FEMA-trailer off-campus housing.
Favorite on-campus expression: Sheeeeyitttttt.
Favorite off-campus expression: Sheeyitt.